"The Man Rules"

[Shadow1]

i wasnt trying to jack the thread, i was simply adding to it. i thought people who read your post would think mine were funny as well.

they were funny. but you kinda posted too many. lol

[2.2AZUL]

Ways To Work Around The Man Rules

The Man Rules


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!


1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, golf or cars.

1. You h ave enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

and sex makes the man rethink eveything thats why we wear sexy shit around the house so we can get what we want...

football not a problem wear a mini skirt and pick up items that are lying on the floor infront of the t.v...hehehehehe....

shape no problem just simply tell you WELL HOW ARE YOU GONNA SEE ME PREFORM IF YOUR BELLY IS IN THE WAY...hehehehehe...get it?

we simpy ask you shit here and there so ya'll won't think we're ignore'n you we know ya'll don't care and don't know the answer but if the best friend is busy at work or with her boyfriend we just strike convo with ya'll to make the time past or something to do or laugh about to our friends the next day

we know ya'll leave the seat up we just want to scream at you any way

we know we got alot of shoes and cloth so what deal with it

yes we say nothing alot and yes we know that you are not gonna bother us every 5 minutes trying to fine out but it will get to you down the line and you'll be asking us in the middle of the night..BABE WHAT YOU WANTED TO TELL US...

we know ya'll aint mind readers but we like to fuck with ya'll

we know shopping is not a sport to you but you'll be asking for shit..babe get me this get me that..this doesn't fit, i don't like this color, what is this,,,these are not the jordans i wanted......
to make it easy FIT shopping with your girl in your day to day shit cause if we don't get it right the first time we will never get it right until you come with us shopping and correct the problem on hand by showing us the size, color, brand and shit you like and want....

you make us happy than we will not make your life a living hell...hehehehehe

and to the rest of the other MAN LAWS give me some time i got an answer to everything....wait that is it...us woman got a short cut to everything don't worry we got it under control....if at first we don't succed try other ways but use cover-ups and under cover work...hehehehehehe

later...but they where all funny i do give it up to you guys....

[verothacamaro]

do you have a link to these?

[verothacamaro]

uh...steelblue. nice rules and all but you kind of stole my thread from me. now everyone is going to be paying attention to your post instead of what i put up there. thenthey wont even get thru yours and post. so not cool man...

I really hope this is sarcasm.

[2.2AZUL]

he's just jealous that steelblue posted more than he did.....lol...he didn't do much research so he's hate'n...lol

[steelbluesleepR]

i didnt do any research either, i just copied and pasted from the facebook group!

[90accordgurl]

he's just jealous that steelblue posted more than he did.....lol...he didn't do much research so he's hate'n...lol

why would you need to research a funny forwarded email that was sent to me? i showed it to him and he thought that ya'll would get a laugh out of it. no where does it say that these are facts. OMGZ!

[2.2AZUL]

why would you need to research a funny forwarded email that was sent to me? i showed it to him and he thought that ya'll would get a laugh out of it. no where does it say that these are facts. OMGZ!

SHADOW1 knows i like to bother him now and than on this site only he will know why i post this post........gezzzzzz

[Shadow1]

SHADOW1 knows i like to bother him now and than on this site only he will know why i post this post........gezzzzzz

calm down folks. lol. Fel she was only joking.

[90accordgurl]

Yes i was just messing. the whole part about " these are not facts" from a womens view or at least mine...lol

[jennaccord_210]

The Man Rules





1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

bahahahahahaha ... good stuff ....

[bagoon316]

that is great, i am cracking up in my office

[Charliehstle209]

^^^

same here... I had to show my boss. He laughed pretty good...

Im going to print this out and stick it to these girls house that i know and title it "MAN RULES!"

[2.2AZUL]

calm down folks. lol. Fel she was only joking.

0oh i didn't sense that.. i'm a little on the grumpy side lately

[Shadow1]

0oh i didn't sense that.. i'm a little on the grumpy side lately

aww. well you know the cb7tuners are here to help and make you smile again