your funniest sex fail..... go ahead confess

[jhondayaaj]

"oh yeah, I'm gonna cum. uh, uh, uh. OH SHIT! my legs are cramping up. fuck. damn. I only did a little. "

[Brandoncb7]

come on i know theres more sex fails out here... doesn't have to be yours but has to be funny... come on

Fail.

These are long and theyre not yours. Like Mclovin said, fuck reading, lol.

What was it that he said??

EDIT: I said these weren't mine too lol. I've gotten shit dicked and had camers in the room before but never as bad as that last story.

[MclovinRR]

hahahah
brandon you crazy...

but please try to keep the long stories short.... reading owns this forum.... hahahhahaha

[MclovinRR]

"oh yeah, I'm gonna cum. uh, uh, uh. OH SHIT! my legs are cramping up. fuck. damn. I only did a little. "

omg that happened to me the other day and i accidentaly jizzed in wifeys eye.... the was like.... omg i cant see... damn im going to be seeing little sperm swimming everywhere for the rest of my life... nooooooooo...lol

[Brandoncb7]

Lol. I did that not too long ago. I pulled out and went to cum on her stomach and it shot up and went on her face lol. It went right across her mouth. All you could hear was a muffled yell of "You asshole you did that on purpose"!!!!!!!

[MclovinRR]

i think we all have... hehehehehehe
funny as hell though...

[Brandoncb7]

I thought so lol. I still fuck with her about to this day. It was funny as hell to me. She didn't seem to find the humor in it though. Then again if had just gotten cum shot across my teeth and face when i wasn't expecting it I probably wouldn't be too happy either. In her hair too lmfao.

[ddcb7]

well one time i was having sex with my ex and right when i pulled out she queefed, and that shit was funny but one time when i was having sex with my gf, i was in the same position and it just reminded me of it and i just started to laugh while having sex and she pulled away and i didnt know what to say to her why i was laughing. she got really mad, but whatever! good times!

[jennaccord_210]

well one time i was having sex with my ex and right when i pulled out she queefed, and that shit was funny but one time when i was having sex with my gf, i was in the same position and it just reminded me of it and i just started to laugh while having sex and she pulled away and i didnt know what to say to her why i was laughing. she got really mad, but whatever! good times!

bahahahah ...

[Makaveli2k]

omg that happened to me the other day and i accidentaly jizzed in wifeys eye....

Accidentally my ass.

[JDM_CB7_TX]

So this one happened to me a while back. I met me a girl that was just about 5' even. We talked for a while and then we finally decide to go out on a date. We go and have dinner at this little Italian resturant. We then headed to the bar that I usually go to down here in downtown. I run in to an ex-fling I had. She was like so this is the new whore you are talking to. I was thinking to my self,"The shit is about to hit the fan". Well the new girl leans over looks her in the face and say's,"Yeah I am the new whore". She then grabs my dick and kisses me. Keep in mind that this was the first time we went out since we met. we have a few and then we head back to her place. Have a few more there and then I am feeling good.

We start kissing and one thing leads to another. I was going down tearing that shit up and she farts. She and I start to laugh and then I gagged. I guess it was the drunk in us. We try to shake it off but it was done. She tries to go down on me and I was like ok maybe she is gonna save it. Well I get back into it and she gets on top and as we are doning our thing I start to laugh. She is slowing down and asks why am I laughing. I told her I couldn't shake off the fact that she farted. I try to make it up to her and get her doggy-style. Well I start smashing it and then low and behold I fart.

I am thinking maybe she didn't here. But she did. Damn that Italian Resturant!

FAIL x2

[starchland]

damn doggystyle after a fart? thats just staring the beast in the eye and remember heat rises

[JDM_CB7_TX]

NO she farted then she was doing a b.j., she then rode me for a while and thats when I started to laugh. Then I made he let me get it doggy-style. LMAO!!!

[Brandoncb7]

So this one happened to me a while back. I met me a girl that was just about 5' even. We talked for a while and then we finally decide to go out on a date. We go and have dinner at this little Italian resturant. We then headed to the bar that I usually go to down here in downtown. I run in to an ex-fling I had. She was like so this is the new whore you are talking to. I was thinking to my self,"The shit is about to hit the fan". Well the new girl leans over looks her in the face and say's,"Yeah I am the new whore". She then grabs my dick and kisses me. Keep in mind that this was the first time we went out since we met. we have a few and then we head back to her place. Have a few more there and then I am feeling good.

We start kissing and one thing leads to another. I was going down tearing that shit up and she farts. She and I start to laugh and then I gagged. I guess it was the drunk in us. We try to shake it off but it was done. She tries to go down on me and I was like ok maybe she is gonna save it. Well I get back into it and she gets on top and as we are doning our thing I start to laugh. She is slowing down and asks why am I laughing. I told her I couldn't shake off the fact that she farted. I try to make it up to her and get her doggy-style. Well I start smashing it and then low and behold I fart.

I am thinking maybe she didn't here. But she did. Damn that Italian Resturant!

FAIL x2

LMAO. I could see this happening and just can't quit laughing right now lol.

[JDM_CB7_TX]

It was funny because I was catching a hell of a buzz and she was damn near drunk. Drunk sex is the best. Funny as hell too. You also go longer with a buzz. atleast I do